I've separated the green bits from the stalky bits and treat it just as you would pak choi bok choi which you'd pay quite a premium for in the supermarket.

我把绿色的部分和茎干的部分分开，就像你在超高价买的白、小白一样。

I thought about calling him, but nothing says stalky, insecure girlfriend like someone who calls at four a.m. My thoughts whirred and tumbled and fell in a great toxic cloud.

我想过给他打电话，但没有什么比凌晨四点打电话给他更能说明顽固、缺乏安全感的女朋友了。